During a sad point in my deli career, I received a record low secret shopper score, primarily for not smiling. In an attempt to earn my way back into the good graces of HR, my self-imposed penance is to make a meat and cheese smiley each shift with the materials at hand. 

For when you can not smile, the meat surely will! Say cheese! Each smiley is $15 dollars. New ones added weekly.

Easy Peasy
from $15.00
Love is sick
from $15.00
The Grinch
from $15.00
Heart a Ham
from $15.00
Ham Burgular
from $15.00
Smile Like You Mean It
from $15.00
Earl
from $15.00
Deli Girls Don't Cry
from $15.00
Sup Cutie
from $15.00
I Ham Unsure
from $15.00
I'm so Provo-Lonely
from $15.00
Old Women Love Me Says the Olive Loaf
from $15.00
That's Baloney, No Bologna
from $15.00
I'm Spicy And I know it
from $15.00
Not As Spicy
from $15.00
My Fake Lashes Bring All the Boys to the Yard
from $15.00
Meat Me At The Holiday Inn
from $15.00
Hug a Ham
from $15.00
Thiccut Smile
from $15.00
Nerd Alert
from $15.00
I love u 2
from $15.00
Franklin
from $15.00
Lil Pep
from $15.00
Baby Swiss Has a Six Pack
from $15.00
Debbie
from $15.00
Jacks
from $15.00
2020 Be like
from $15.00
Balonely
from $15.00
Stanley
from $15.00
Heather
from $15.00
Would I Make A Good Mom?
from $15.00
Cat Eyes Meow
from $15.00
Deli Dancer
from $15.00
Luke is Warm
from $15.00
Damn Imma Sad Ham
from $15.00
Holly
from $15.00
I only want the Turkey if It's Moist Enough
from $15.00
Sam the Witch
from $15.00
Dillon
from $15.00
xoxo
from $15.00
Chewy
from $15.00
Molly
from $15.00
Justin
from $15.00
Frank
from $15.00
Deli Rapper
from $15.00
Sam
from $15.00
Never Been Kissed
from $15.00
Larry
from $15.00
I went to art school
from $15.00
Leonard
from $15.00
I'm a Deli Baby
from $15.00
Deli Days of Our Lives
from $15.00
I'm Not Much of A Hugger
from $15.00
Don't Be a Shy Ham
from $15.00
Charlie
from $15.00
Salami Spa Day
from $15.00
Colby say Cheese
from $15.00
Terry
from $15.00
Wayne
from $15.00
Beef Cakes
from $15.00
Jim
from $15.00
Mo Mortadella
from $15.00
The Deli Uncle Chuckle
from $15.00
xoxo
from $15.00
Ham Man Bun
from $15.00
Dan
from $15.00
Record Low Smile Score
from $15.00
Mom I can Taste the Nitrates
from $15.00
Am I happy to live in Nebraska?
from $15.00
Donald Judd Slices on a 39
from $15.00
Ham Gone Wild
from $15.00
Fresh AF
from $15.00
Deli Dancer
from $15.00
In the Nude
from $15.00
Eye Eye Popeye
from $15.00
Doris
from $15.00
Chedda Believe I'm Cute
from $15.00
Onion Breath
from $15.00
Cheat-Ho Smiley
from $15.00
Tinder and Trident
from $15.00
Peppermint Bologna
from $15.00
Later H8ter
from $15.00
Smile With Your Eyes
from $15.00
He Had Good Intentions
from $15.00
Hey Kiddo
from $15.00
How's the weather out there?
from $15.00
Lincoln Logs
from $15.00
Sunshine
from $15.00
Deli Hottie
from $15.00
Diane
from $15.00
It's just Lunch!
from $15.00
Little League
from $15.00
Lazarus
from $15.00
Deb
from $15.00
Joe Nose
from $15.00
Brian wears Dockers
from $15.00
RB
from $15.00
Don't Be A Square
from $15.00
Ham Salad is For Lovers
from $15.00
Falling Apart
from $15.00
Dark Meat
from $15.00
Truly
from $15.00
Johnny Salami
from $15.00
Oliver
from $15.00
Hug a Ham
from $15.00
Jess
from $15.00
Phil
from $15.00
Sorry Charlie
from $15.00
That'll Do Me
from $15.00
Scrappy Doo
from $15.00
Shower Time
from $15.00
Jerry
from $15.00
Gregory
from $15.00
What a Hunk, a Chunk
from $15.00
Felt Cute, Might Delete Later
from $15.00
My Eyes Are Meatballs
from $15.00
Eggstacy
from $15.00
Fred
from $15.00
All Natural
from $15.00
Love Me Or Leave Me
from $15.00
Let Us Remember The Salad Bar
from $15.00
OR is MORE
from $15.00
Tuna Go Fish
from $15.00
Life is the Pits
from $15.00
Cyclops Is A Cold Cut
from $15.00
NOFOMO
from $15.00
All My Friends Live In My Phone
from $15.00
You Can't Spell Meat without Me
from $15.00
Salami Has A Hard Day
from $15.00
Meat is Meat
from $15.00
ASL
from $15.00
Brad
from $15.00
Salami Has A Hair Day
from $15.00
Jack
from $15.00
Grandma loves you
from $15.00
Monica
from $15.00
Cheddar is Better
from $15.00
Charcuterie Sure is A Hard Word To Say
from $15.00
Damn the Ham and the Man
from $15.00
Golden Brown
from $15.00
Megan Is A Vegan
from $15.00
Fun Meat
from $15.00
Me, He, Meh.
from $15.00
Beach Please
from $15.00
What the Duck, Just My Luck
from $15.00
Ahhh Hahaha
from $15.00
Monday Mood
from $15.00
Just Another Day In Paradise
from $15.00
The Bresaola
from $15.00
Tickle Me Pickle
from $15.00
Wakey Wakey
$15.00
A Good Wad
from $15.00
Snow Day Hey
from $15.00
Tis The Season
from $15.00
Go Eat Oscar Mayer
from $15.00
Slice Me I dare you
from $15.00
Lil Hammy
from $15.00
Base Balls
from $15.00
What's Shakin' Bacon?
from $15.00
Nebraska Has A Nice Shape
from $15.00
Me Cheesin
from $15.00
Doug
from $15.00
Grin And Greet Within Ten Feet
from $15.00
Deli Man of My Dreams
from $15.00
Americans Love Alliteration
from $15.00
Blessed and Dog Obsessed
from $15.00
Winner Winner Chicken Dinner
from $15.00
Oh so Pretty
from $15.00
Carly
from $15.00
Narcissus A Slice
from $15.00
In Need of a Bang Trim
from $15.00
Johnny Salami
from $15.00
The Deli Winker
from $15.00
Scrappy
from $15.00
Blaze
from $15.00
Chuck
from $15.00
It is What it is
from $15.00
Jason
from $15.00
Provolone is the Loneliest Cheese
from $15.00
I Only Have Eyes For You
from $15.00
She Giggles Too Much
from $15.00
Be Mine
from $15.00
Jimmy or John
from $15.00
I Feel Bad For Malls
from $15.00
Long Texts On the Beach
from $15.00
A Hot Topic, A Hot Pocket
from $15.00
Chad
from $15.00
Karl
from $15.00
I'll be Your Google
from $15.00
Hipster Ham double smokes
from $15.00
Rosa
from $15.00
Kelly
from $15.00
Pepper Anne
from $15.00
Ham Is Not My Jam
from $15.00
Kip
from $15.00
Chelsea
from $15.00
Della
from $15.00
Just Do It
from $15.00
Jennifer
from $15.00
Kimberly
from $15.00